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Due to domestic constraints (yeah, that's one way of putting it!), I've watched the last few episodes in weird way: I watch the last half hour on TV, read some reactions, then get the ep. from itunes on Friday, and watch the first half hour, and usually the second half hour a second time. I expect it's warping my reactions some! And a better person would wait, and watch the whole thing through without being spoiled. But I am not that person...

Anyway, with 4.21, I definitely liked the first half hour better. Some reactions

I was interested in how much the Sam detox scenes emphasized Sam's self-hatred (or self-disappointment, to put it less strongly), but anyway something we haven't seen much of this season: his discussion with wee!Sam of whether he has failed to be normal; and his anguish, when DT!Dean tells him he's always felt different, like a freak. Another thing that came across the the scene with DT!Dean, which we haven't seen much of at all this season, is Sam's desperate need for Dean's approval, respect (love?). One tiny choice of phrasing that drove this home for me was when DT!Dean is about to call Sam a monster, and Sam says "no, no, don't you say it." The weird locution ("don't you say it" instead of just "don't say it") reminded me of "Devil's Trap," where Dean uses that locution twice in the final scene: once pleading to possessed!John ("don't you let him kill me") and once pleading with Sam not to shoot John ("don't you do it, Sam"). I don't know it this is a Winchester-ism or a Texas-ism or what (that final scene in DT is like a Texas-accent competition between all three Js), but the tiny verbal echo just reminded me of the intensity of the Winchester family bonds (and their continual betrayal).

(and yeah, I did go back and watch the last scene in DT to check, which may have been a mistake, since, my goodness, IMO that is one of SPN's absolute best scenes, if not the best, and nothing in WTLB really approached it, again, IMO).

Okay: I say that about the Sam self-hatred in the detox scene because I think it explains some of the intensity of his anger (hatred) towards Dean at the end. If Sam hates Dean, it's in part because he hates Dean for loving him, even though he hates himself. As a lot of people have pointed out, even Sam's unconscious can't confront the fact that Dean loves him that much, and he has to conjure up Mary as the figure of unconditional love, when in fact the person who has offered him that unconditional love through most of his life has been his brother. (More literally, of course, I think we're supposed to understand Sam's murderous violence, with Dean and earlier with Bobby, as not!Sam, as evidence that he's been changed by the demon blood.)

I've been wondering what kind of narrative paradigm the show was going to invoke to motivate the Sam-n-Dean break-up that been on the horizon all season, and I was a little disappointed that they ended up *mostly* going with the most conventional of brotherly conflict dynamics: rivalry. You know: "I'm the one who can stop the apocalypse," "no, I'm the (chosen) one to stop the apocalypse"; "you're weak," "no, you're weak." Cain and Abel, Jacob and Esau, etc. It feels a little contrived, since rivalry hasn't really characterized the Bros. Winchesters' relationship up until this season, maybe not before the reveal in 4.16 about Dean's role. I guess I can understand why they went that way, though, and hopefully it's going to have some nice narrative pay off, at some point.

Of course, the rivalry dynamic was layered over with a "prodigal son" paradigm, produced by having Dean echo John's words to Sam departing for Stanford. But the power of that repetition was dampened somewhat by the fact that Dean playing John rang a little false (especially after JTS), and by the fact, as I said above, and as lots of other people have said: if Dean is/was Sam's parent, the role he played was not exactly paternal.

I was also a little disappointed that once again, it was Sam who did the leaving in that final scene. I quite wanted Dean to be the one who walked out the door, since it would have been something new. Sam's always leaving: off to Stanford, in "Scarecrow," in "Hunted," night after night in S4. Dean doesn't (can't) leave--and while that keeps him true to canon, I thought after finding his "line" about Sam, he might be able to. At least he didn't follow Sam, and Sam's plan, despite the pleading, which may be new.

Okay--I've gotten those criticisms off my chest (and they are mostly things I *wished* could have happened). There were a lot of things I liked about the ep. And primary among them was JP's acting. Definitely the best thing I've seen him do. He was REALLY GOOD, throughout (sorry to be so surprised about that...). I particularly liked that little scene with Bobby, when he put the shotgun over his heart, and then went from that to beating Bobby over the head with it, violent and regretful at the same time. It was something I've always thought JA is very good at--shifting from emotion to emotion very quickly, or layering them over one another--whereas JP can sometimes get stuck in one emotion for episodes at a time (hello, "Yellow Fever"). Not here.

JA, on the other hand, seemed a little rote. Not bad, just kind of cycling through his standard Dean-isms: wibble, shouting, single tear. Sounds like maybe he was sick? In which case, poor guy! Or it could be that he actually wasn't given much new to do by the script (see above). In any case, it's not going to shake my adoration of JA or Dean. The one Dean scene I really liked was the Dean-Castiel scene; maybe because the chemistry between the actors is still so new. And even though that too was a knee-jerk Dean response ("must do anything to spare Sam pain"), both characters seemed so on guard, filled with conflicting emotions towards one another, that it really worked for me.

Here's hoping I get to see the finale in real time!
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