ariadnes_string

Okay, since others seem to have amply covered the awesomeness of wet!Steve and tree-climbing!Kono and book-listing!Danny, let’s take up another aspect of this episode, shall we?

[Scene: Steve’s darkened bedroom]

Voice: Steven.

Steve [opening his eyes and fumbling for his bedside gun]: Wha’? Who’s there?

Voice: Steven. Steven James McGarrett. Awake.

Steve: [flicking on the light and sweeping the gun across the empty bedroom]: Listen, mister, I don’t care what kind of disembodied voice thing you have going on, but you should know I answer to nobody but the governor and—oh wait.

Voice: Yes. I am that I am. Adonai. Yaweh. The omnipotent and omnipresent.

Steve [lowering the gun and looking a little wide-eyed]: Oh.

Voice: Steven, I do not usually make personal visits like this, but prayers have reached us in Heaven. Heartfelt prayers. Frequent prayers. Prayers that have caused some of my seraphs to start wearing noise-canceling headphones.

Steve [suddenly realizing what this is all about]: Okay. Look, I get it. I know there’s some stuff that really pushes Danny’s buttons. But he’s gotta know that I would never get him hurt. Not intentionally, anyway. It’s just that I--

[A small gust of wind ruffles the curtains. It might be interpreted as a divine sigh.]

Voice: Yes. As one of my prophets once said, a leopard cannot change its spots. All we ask is that you—how shall I put it?—ratchet it down a notch. Just enough that my angels can go back to concentrating on other things. Global warming, say, or unrest in the Middle East. Lost puppies. Are we clear?

Steve [ever so slightly chagrined]: We’re clear.

Voice: Don’t make me come down here again, Steven.

Steve: Sir, no sir.

There is a whoosh of air.

Steve: Sir? Sir? Hold up a minute, would you? There’s something I need your help with—there’re these letters, coming under my door—Sir? Sir?

[silence]